Thinking Positive is a matter of replacing negative self talk with positive self talk. Sounds easy, huh…we all know it’s not.First, you must be aware of your negative thoughts.
How many times do you remember getting up on Monday and thinking, “I hate Mondays!” or maybe you even started thinking that on Sunday night. Now you have ruined two days.
Negative thoughts start when we are children. We internalize the things we have been told from our childhood. Did your Dad ever say, “Do you think money grows on trees?” He was really saying to you, there is not enough money for you to have what you want.
Did your mother tell you to finish the food in your plate because there are starving children in this world? She thought she was thinking positive helping you stay healthy and not being wasteful. Now you never walk away from a plate unless it is cleaned even though you are 50 pounds overweight. You internalized what was said to you to mean that you were lucky to have food on your table and selfish if you didn’t finish it.
And I know we have all heard this one at one time or another, “What is wrong with you?” I have said it to my kids. As parents we don’t think about the long term effects our words can have on our children. They do something like write on your walls with permanent mark…you say, “What is wrong with you?” It is a natural reaction. Unfortunately, the child thinks there must be something wrong with them because my mother or father told me so. When you should have asked yourself, “How did they have access to the marker?”
Do you find yourself today saying the same thing to yourself? You locked your keys in your car…all of a sudden that voice in your head says, “What is wrong with you?” or maybe, “You idiot!” We all do it.
As parents we do the best we can. It is a difficult job and we revert to what we have been taught. But now it is time to turn off those negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones. You want to have a positive thinking day, it’s much better than a negative one.
Thinking Positive has to be practiced. There are several ways to introduce positive thoughts and erase the negative ones but it takes conditioning. It won’t happen overnight.First, be aware of that voice in your head. Listen to him. When you hear him say something negative consciously stop and replace the negative thought with a positive one.
“What is wrong with you?” Stop! Why did I say that? Probably because you did something you thought was dumb. Replace the thought with, “There is nothing wrong with me. I am human and I make mistakes like everyone does.” That is it. Don’t go overboard with affirmations such as I love myself, I am wonderful or I don’t do dumb things. Your subconscious will be saying, “This girl’s lost it.”
To be serious, make it simple and direct. And most of all keep it positive. The next time you make a mistake, maybe you will automatically think, “I am human.” I call this Power Positive thinking.
Many of us have trouble taking a risk because we are afraid of failure. We are thinking positive, positive we will fail. Most of our most famous inventors, politicians and scientists would tell you they would not have ended up where they were without taking a risk and many times having a great deal of failures to reach success.
Thinking positive and positive self talk can help to reduce the fear of failure. Ask yourself, “What is the worst thing that could happen?” Make a list. Then ask yourself, “What are all the great things that could happen?” Make another list. Compare the two lists. Do the positives outweigh the negatives? Then go for it. If the negatives outweigh the positives then ask yourself, “What do I need to do to minimize some of the negatives?” Make another list of the pro’s and cons.
As you can see on the con side, I have no money coming in if I quit my job, I don’t really have anything saved up to start and I am not sure who would hire me. But on the pro side, I could work from home, have flexibility and I think I have a lot to offer nursing.
So my common sense approach to thinking positive is to look into small business loans. Start to network with other nursing consultants to see how they started to build cliental and start saving some money.
In a few months, I have secured a small business loan. Have done some research on consulting and have networked with several nursing consultants. I have a few potential clients. So I start my business while still working my full time job. I am thinking positive and it is getting easier.
As I become more successful, I will cut back hours or completely resign from my hospital job. Because now I have a clear picture that I can succeed.
You see, I could have given up because I didn’t have the money or know much about starting my own business but instead I told myself I could do it and put a plan into place to achieve my goal. I did not however count on an affirmation to make all my wishes come true. That is not what positive thinking is all about.
It is about knowing you CAN, eliminating the negative thoughts and putting together a sound plan. Now I could still fail but I am in a much better position to do so and my failures now can be turned into positive lessons learned. This is the art of positive thinking.
To eliminate negative thoughts you will want to check yourself several times a day. Listen to what you are thinking and if it sounds negative replace it with something positive. Eventually, it will become second nature and you will catch yourself and correct yourself without much effort.
Be careful though because some negative thoughts come more in the form of feelings just as thinking positive can come in the form of feelings.
Say I wanted to buy the Lexus Coupe (I love that car) and the retail price is $76,000. I can tell myself that I love it, I deserve it and I am going to buy it. All positive but if my stomach is turning and I get dizzy thinking about how to make the payments each month then I am obviously not truly having positive thoughts about owning the car.
That being said, I should not give up my dream of owning it. Instead, I need to do the same process as above, a pro’s and con’s list and develop an action plan. If I truly want the care than I will figure out a way to get it by thinking positive thoughts.
Do you see now that the art of positive thinking is not about just think positive but using power positive thinking to strategically place yourself in the right place to achieve your goals? Thinking Positive
As always be well,